Check out this piece of gadgetry. the Wingscapes BirdCam. I may have to get one of these. They look like the camera traps they use on my least favorite cryptozoology show, MonsterQuest. This would really come in handy at the house, snapping pictures of the none birds that frequent my yard. Not a single one. I'm the only Naturalist in the neighborhood and I have almost no wildlife in my yard. But maybe the Wingscapes will capture an image of whatever the hell is under my deck that the dog simply must bark at. My guess? Sasquatch...it's a big deck.

Gizmodo gets free stuff.
Key sentence in the above link: Apple sent us a Macbook Air
It wasn't: Apple sent us a Macbook air and a bill for the Macbook air plus shipping. They sent them one.
I don't get free stuff. OK, I get it, I'm not a huge gadgetry tech site, I am not visited as much as that site. ( I have literally tens of visitors bi monthly) But if Apple sent ME a Macbook air, I wouldn't call it shit, like I did without even seeing or holding it. If I want to review this thing I will have to literally go to an Apple Store and review it there. If the store isn't crowded, I may even be able to post a review there. But I'd much rather post the review on my very own Macbook Air, in my underwear. Which I'm fairly certain isn't allowed in the Apple Store. Maybe I'll have to stop using the F-bomb in my posts, put up some banner ads and make the site look like an Airstream trailer, but just maybe I can get someone to give me something free. Unlike this which is the only free thing that I have received this year:

I'm a Producer for the CBS television program 60 minutes. I've been a television producer for over ten years, six of those years have been at CBS. I've been recently moved to the position supporting Andy Rooney, the long serving editorial contributor to 60 Minutes. He was also in World War Two. In addition he is old as hell, crazy and I'm pretty sure that my boss hates me and that's why I'm producing for this old prick.
Last week was a fun one. I was surfing the internet looking for some poular interest stories for Andy to comment on when I heard him wheezing down the hall. When he appeared at my door ten minutes later he blurted out
"I need everything you've got on shoelaces!"
I've got nothing on shoelaces. Andy then slumped into the Herman Miller chair in my office and rolled himself back to his office which was carved out of a live tree one hunddred years ago.
The week before that I had to get three hours of b-roll on Dunk Tanks. He never even wrote a story, he instead did ten minutes of improvised riffs on olives.
I plan to kill andy Rooney if he isn't suffocated by his own eyebrows soon. All I will have to do is shoot him in the face when he comes to my office asking me if I can get some footage of Bigfoot for a dream he's planning on having that night.

If you are over 40 and own a PC, you have lost your windows toolbar (it's actually called a Taskbar). Perhaps you are looking for it right now. Look to the right. Yep, right over there
Is that where you put it when you accidentally put the keys to your Volvo on your mouse? Well have no fear, I have a fix.
Get windows XP. Yep, Windows Millennium isn't cutting it anymore hippie. It is true that you can lose the taskbar in Windows XP, you can lose it, not me, I don't even know how to lose it, but it is a pretty safe place for your taskbar. Don't do Vista, Vista doesn't even have a taskbar, it has a Barista who makes you a Latte and then erases your hard disk looking for your monthly budget for Recumbent Bicycle magazines. If you decide to get a Mac, you're on your own, that taskbar is translucent and can read your mind.

Top Ten Failed Victorian Inventions


I'm trying some new stuff here, so click on the titles below and you'll see the picture that is associated with the title. I'll clean all of this up and make it sexy when I get a chance.

10) Carriage-less Horse

9) Palm Pilot Beta

8) Whale-Fired Powerplant

7) Backwards Top Hats

6) The Tube

5) Handlebar Mustache Bell

4) The Reverse Cowgirl Missionary Position

3) Steam Powered Cat Asshole

2) Hall & Oats

1) Openly Gay Teddy Roosevelt

Cause this is basically what the Cloverfield monster looks like, just turn the front limbs backwards. Seriously.
And all of those little monsters that you heard about?
These guys. I tried to put a spider head on a bug from Starship Troopers... And I couldn't find a picture of the creepy things from Pitch Black...But it looks like all of those things had a baby, an awful, crazy killing baby

10.) Hub

9.) Router

8.) LAN

7.) Gizmodo

6.) USB Port

5.) WiFi

4.) C-Net

3.) Penis

2.) Hard Coding

1.) Dongle

My iMac works better, doesn't need a battery and I like it. Please text me when this Apple shit starts to get interesting rather than just smaller.

Won't take out the dog. What, I'm supposed to get up and take the dog out? I don't even like the dog. It's her dog. and with that dog comes great responsibility. Would I be a good husband, or be setting a good example if I took the dog out? It's her dog. OK, she just did it. I should probably stop blogging about her. Oh crap.

There is no God if this man becomes anything resembling a President.
The Huckster on Evolution and how old the Earth isn't.

People ask me all of the time (namely my wife) "Why do you insist on calling yourself a Doctor?"
Answer? Because I am a Doctor. I may not have a fancy diploma or a cool white coat, but I'm a Doctor. I may not carry a stethoscope or know what angina is, but I'm a Doctor. I may get dizzy at the sight of blood, vomit when I see someone else vomit, faint when I cut myself, turn the channel if there is a medical program on, but I am a Doctor none the less. I did not attend medical school, I attend the school of life everyday. I have a Bachelor's degree in Broadcasting and an Associate's degree in confidence.
I'm Dr. Mobey and I'm a Goddamned Doctor.

CES (Consumer Electronics Show) is going on right now in Las Vegas, the birthplace of VD. Gizmodo, Jizzplace.com, EnGadget and probably my three year old nephew are all live-blogging from the convention floor. where am I? In my living room on a laptop watching Dora the Explorer with my daughter. This show is like kid Meth, they love it. And I'm sorry, but any show that has a two story high chicken in it must have been written by stoners. Or David Lynch.
Another reason that I have absolutely nothing to blog about is- Allright, be right back I have to take cube steak out of the freezer according to my wife...WTF is cube steak!?